You shouldn’t fucking be here.
Tyler watched Maria run around, her motions quick and swift. The way she danced through her chores brought a growl to his lips. He hated everything about her.
Stupid fucking bitch.
The way her hips swayed, the way her tattoos popped on her tan skin. The way her stupid afro still complimented her heart-shaped face. Her dark brown eyes still brought a churning in his stomach. His eyes went to the plate she placed in front of him, a chicken burrito made just the way he loved it. The way his dad used to when shit hit the fan. He watched Maria walk away before hesitating. He didn’t want to waste a good burrito but she made it.
He pushed the plate off the table, the glass shattering on impact and being the only sound ringing throughout the house. The burrito looked as if it had been massacred. He waited for Maria to scream at him, chew his ear out then swing at him so he could kick her out of his house.
She just came over.
She swept up the mess and returned with a second plate for him. Tyler looked at her for a second and stared at the second plate and pushes it.
“ Pero Tyler, ¿qué te pasa? ¿No te sientes bien?”
Once more, Maria returned to clean up his mess with the concern that he didn’t feel well.
“What the fuck is wrong with you,” Tyler asked.
“Nothing,” Maria said, “You’re the one breaking plates.”
“You know what I mean! Why aren’t you yelling at me? Hit me!”
“I, I don’t…did you want to foreplay,” Maria asked.
“NO!”
“Then why am I hitting you?”
“Just do it!”
“Would that make you happy,” Maria asked.
Tyler stared at her in disbelief as he clenched his fist before looking to his feet.
“I want you to leave,” he mumbled.
“Then I’ll leave.”
Tyler immediately looked at her and hesitated, biting his tongue as his eyes glossed over. Every nerve in his body was stiff, his lips quivering while excuses ran through his mind.
“Then I’ll stay.”
“I didn’t say I wanted you to,” he said.
“No…but you’re holding my wrist,” she said.
Tyler removed his hand the moment she mentioned it. He looked away from her, unable to speak with the weight now pushing against his chest.
“¿Quieres que me vaya? ¿Quieres que me quede? ¿Qué quieres Tyler? ”
Tyler bit his bottom lip, his eyes scanning the room as if there was an answer somewhere on the walls. The silence settled onto him, carving into his bones as he tried to organize his thoughts. He wasn’t entirely sure what he wanted from her. He was a walking contradiction with her. She always brought out a side of him he didn’t even know existed.
“Why are you so okay with whatever I want? Why aren’t you fighting me,” Tyler asked.
He knew if he saw her pupils dilate she was lying to him. Maybe that’s what he wanted. He wanted to see that she was lying. If she lies, why would he want her around? She wouldn’t be able to be honest with him about anything if she couldn’t be honest about a simple question.
“Because I hurt you,” Maria said.
Tyler’s eyes widen as he stepped away from her.
“What?”
“I hurt you, Tyler,” Maria said, “I fucked up. You have every right to tell me to fuck off. I want to make up for it. I’ve apologized. I hoped you would see that I’ve changed and I don’t want your forgiveness because I know what I did. I don’t forgive myself for that.”
Tyler bit his bottom lip.
“I just want to be with you and Nico. I don’t want to be anywhere else but I won’t force it. So, tell me to leave and I will.”
“You’re a fucking idiot,” Tyler whispered. “Quédate Conmigo.”
“I can’t hear you.”
“I have to fucking repeat myself? Stay with me,” he said.
He could see her eyes lighting up at his request. Her arms wrapped around his torso and he melted into the hug. Her warm embrace, he remembered how much he longed just to hold her. How her head rested against his chest and her hair brushed against his chin when it was in an afro.
“I love you,” Maria said.
“I know.”
Heather Marie 